Real Diagnosis
July 21, 2008
In June 2006 after an unsuccessful year of pursuing some treatment with three different neurologists, I hit the jackpot with Sis’s neurologists (one fellow and one Multiple Sclerosis specialist). From June until early August I went through MRIs, blood tests for a whole lot of different diseases, and lumbar puncture.
When these test results came back to Dr. Kindhearted (my primary neurologist) and Dr. Caring (the MS specialist), Dr. Kindhearted called informing of these results. Unfortunately, they all came back normal. Now I say unfortunately only because this delayed diagnosis; and I thought they would stop treating me. I had only just begun the baclofen but I felt some improvement in my legs.
I followed up in August 2006 and was sure Dr. Kindhearted and Dr. Caring were going to say, “Well since all the tests are normal except for that small white spot on your MRI which we are pretty sure isn’t causing all your symptoms there is nothing more we can do.” But they didn’t. In fact, Dr. Caring said the normal test results just makes their job harder, but that is ok because they like a challenge. He also said that even normal test results are helpful to them because it points them in different directions or helps eliminate other diseases. Multiple Sclerosis is really a disease of elimination: other diseases must be ruled out to rule in MS. We were still on track, they were still digging.
They increased my baclofen again at this visit in the beginning of August. They put me through the litany of neurological tests in the office. They then conferred and returned to the exam room. Apparently, my eyes were getting worse. The abnormal eye movements were more pronounced, incoordination worsened in both hands and legs. The spasticity worsened, worsened from mid-June to early August. That was disheartening to hear. Although I knew my eyes were not right. It felt as if I was losing coordination of my eyes, like my eye muscles were weak and didn’t seem to do what I wanted them to do.
In addition to increasing the baclofen, they did genetic testing for CADASIL. As you may know my two sisters were already diagnosed with RRMS. MS is one of the differential diseases when diagnosing CADASIL (cerebral autosomal dominant arteriopathy with subcortical infarcts and leukoencephalopathy). WOW, what is that?
Well according to the Genetics Home Reference (Click for the long story) website it is an inherited condition that causes strokes and other impairments. That’s they short story.
I was sent home with the appointment for the end of September still in tact. It was then that I would get the results from the genetic testing. Yikes! Although the docs didn’t seem to think that it was CADASIL, but due diligence must be followed. Ok, I guess I can deal with that, I mean after all these docs were traveling down roads of which I am sure the buffoons I had previously seen never even heard about.
Hubby and I went home relieved. We survived a second appointment and these docs and Dr. Kindhearted and Dr. Caring were still busy searching for answers.
Multiple Sclerosis Specialists
July 20, 2008
In April 2006 I felt hopeless, the lowest point in my life. After spending a year trying to find a doctor that would help me, diagnose me, relieve some symptoms, SOMETHING, I was left adrift in a sea of incompetent, callous, unethical neurologists. My family and my primary care physician kept me floating. But when the third neurologist suggested I was psychologically impaired and that I needed a psychiatrist not a neurologist hopelessness settled in for a long winters nap.
Swearing off doctors, I called my pcp to let him know what happened. He suggested another angle, an orthopedist. He figured we would get help by going through the back door. An orthopedist would surely suggest a neurologist after performing some type of testing, further strengthening my case. What was I a defendant in a court case? NO! I am done; no more doctors. Thanks, but no thanks.
I know what you’re thinking, “What about your hubby?” “What did he do, say?” He told me we were going to pursue some avenue, find help somewhere even if he had to physically carry me there. He was not going to give up. My sisters (both of whom were already diagnosed with MS-having MRIs and Lumbar Punctures consistent with MS), my mother, my friends, my brother (one of three that kept me going) would not let me give up.
So, my sister who lives about an hour away in a nearby state suggested I see her MS specialist, a well-known and respected neurologist. Hubby said make the appointment, I’ll get her there. Sis, called and said her neurologist (a then fellow overseen by this respected MS specialist) wanted to see me. He wanted to help, wanted to work with me. Assured Sis that if he couldn’t help because it wasn’t MS, he would find someone that would and could help me. Hubby kept telling me we were going to that appointment, end of story.
Seemed like a life saver was thrown to me, but at this point I was more than skeptical. My appointment was early June 2006 at 4pm. I don’t remember the day but I remember the time, because we left his office at 7pm. Yes, the doctors took three hours to review my ‘case’. WOW!
They(the fellow and ms specialist) left no stone unturned. I mean they listened to an entire year of my life-symptoms, tests, results. They asked pointed questions for clarification. Then they examined me. I followed their fingers in front of my face, they pulled at my legs, I performed finger coordination tests and finally I walked. But not very far. Immediately they saw problems. Actually they saw problems when I first walked into the exam room, but the second time confirmed what they saw and what their examinations found.
The result: some medication for my symptoms. Initially I was put on Baclofen for spasticity. Spasticity was causing the stiffness in my legs and the pain in my legs and the spasms in my legs. WOW! Medicine that was for a real symptom. Dare I have a little hope! I was cautious. I really held back my hope.
Holding back hope was very difficult because these two doctors cared about me. Really, the way the listened, asked follow-up questions, they way the spoke to me and hubby. When one person reaches out to another out of care, concern is truly a miracle. I had already experienced that with my family and friends. I knew what it looked like, sounded like, felt like. These docs were the true thing.
After their conference, they came back into the exam room and laid out an entire treatment plan. This included the aforementioned Baclofen. Also, they would redo MRIs, massive amount of bloodwork, and a lumbar punture: FOR STARTERS! Then they made two follow-up appointments. One six weeks later after the tests and one six weeks after that to monitor my progress. Then what?
Well their response was “we keep following you, until something definite shows. Meanwhile we keep treating the symptoms.” I was their patient, now. Sometimes, they said, it can take a year or more before a diagnosis can be made. Sometimes, because there is NO DEFINITIVE test for MS, a definite diagnosis cannot ever be made. But the good news was they could be sure this was neurological, upper motor neuron disease. They could tell that right then, upon examination. All else was up for grabs. It may be MS, it may not but they could and would treat my symptoms.
Hope springs eternal.
Hopeless
July 16, 2008
In March 2006, a year after symptoms reared their ugly heads, I was still no closer to a diagnosis let alone a neurologist willing to work with me. The last neurologist dangled the carrot then when it wasn’t in the best financial interest if the rather large and well-known clinic in my area she dropped me like a WWE wrestler, flat on the mat with a metal chair.
Still the symptoms worsened. My two sisters diagnosed with MS, were being treated and doing pretty well. My slide downward was more like an avalanche. My pcp, who was pretty certain I had MS, suggested one more doc. He was located at a major hospital in a large northeast city about an hour and a half away from me. I hesitantly agreed. So far each neurologist I saw seemed worse than the last. Maybe this wasn’t neurological, but my pcp insisted it was, he was unable to make a diagnosis though, considering he was a general practitioner, internal medicine.
Six weeks later, now late April 2006, we made the journey to see this doctor. He has got to help us, we thought. He works for this great hospital. We even know people who had worked there and gave great reviews of the institution. This was it, I could feel it.
Stumbling into the office I could barely fill out the paperwork, my vertigo was off the hook. My cement laden legs just making it to the office. Hubby all the while by my side, probably more worried than I. I knew something major was wrong; after a year I began to accept it, he hadn’t yet.
This time we only waited a few moments. The doctor actually retrieved us from the waiting room himself. WOW! I felt the slightest twinge of hope like the tiniest bud pushing through the newly thawed earth in spring.
This man, spent about fifteen minutes with me. He couldn’t even pull off the pictures of my MRIs on the CD that I gave him. He spent about ten minutes of that time asking me questions about my childhood. My hubby asked him if he was a neurologist, thinking my pcp made an appointment with the wrong doctor.
This man didn’t even read the information my pcp sent. His diagnosis was “an unknown disease of pyschological origin”. WHAT??!!?? I sat stunned, unable to talk, utter a word, move. Hubby asked what that meant. According to this man who apparently earned a doctoral degree somewhere it meant I was making up all of this. Clearly this disease was all in my head cleverly devised by me to get out of work, to drop out of family life because I was unhappy. WHAT??!!!??!! He pulled out that new bud just pushing through the thawed earth in spring. Pulled it out roots and all tossing it into metal trash can to die.
My hubby tried to argue with him. I got up, dragged my cement legs to the exam room door and told my hubby we were leaving. Another few steps and I turned myself around. I had ENOUGH! I told that man exactly what I thought of him. I could not and still cannot bring myself to think of that man as a doctor. He did not help in any way, he was uncaring, pompous, rude and had no medical basis for his diagnosis.
Then I walked out. My hubby stood looking at this man for a second. The man said he was doing his best. Hubby told him, if that is his best then he needed to change professions. Hubby then escorted me out of the office, down the hall, in the elevator to the lobby, into the garage to our car. Only then did I breathe, but said nothing the entire ride home.
I am not sure if I spoke when I got home. What was I going to do? It seems the medical profession is great as long as they can diagnose you in the first visit. If they can’t then the problem must be psychological or non-existent. What was I going to do?
Everyone-hubby, friends, mom, brothers, sisters-reassured me over and over again to keep trying doctors. They gave me the will, hope to live. Looking into my son’s eyes, seeing his face everyday kept me going. Without these people I am not sure where I would be right now. They put me upon their backs and carried me forward. The act of people reaching out to people is so powerful it permanently changes lives. This is the biggest lesson I have learned my entire life. A single act of kindness, of simply putting someone else before yourself, is the miracle of life.
Seizures v. Complicated Migraines
July 15, 2008
In June 2005, I was under the care of Dr. Headupmyarse. After my MRI showed only one white spot, my TEE was normal the doc decided I was having seizures even though my EEG was normal. Depakote was the drug of choice. To say I do not like Depakote is a huge understatement. Depakote turned me in to a zombie. A zombie that still had all the symptoms I started with: incoordination, vertigo, trouble walking, loss of sensation, severe tiredness, etc. The incoordination, loss of sensation and trouble walking affected mostly my right side with some left side involvement.
After several months on Depakote without any change, Dr. Headupmyarse decided to do another MRI. This time he felt that I did sound like a case of primary progressive multiple sclerosis. So this time I had a brain and c-spine MRI. By now you can guess the results-except for a small white spot, normal.
Dr. Headupmyarse decided instead of seizures as Depakote should keep them under control, I must have complicated or ocular or basilar migraines. Weening off Depakote and onto Topamax (liked even less than Depakote) took about six more weeks. By this time it is October and we are getting upset with this neurologist. He seemed close his eyes, open the big book of neurology, and stab at a disease with his index finger. Some type of migraine du jour.
I went from feeling like a zombie to a deep dark place on Topamax. And no, I was not any better off. My symptoms kept progressing and we were now worried. Dr. Headupmyarse certainly lived up to this name.
All the while, my pcp kept thinking I had multiple sclerosis. Finally, during the first week of December I suffered pain and extreme stiff in my right leg. My pcp reexamined me, and again thought it looked like MS. So, I asked if he could recommend another neurlogist. He did and I had an appointment in mid-January.
I went to a well respected clinic in an adjoining state. It took about an hour drive, but at this point hubby and I would drive a day if needed. Armed with my pcp’s notes, Dr. Headupmyarse’s notes, and MRIs I met Dr. Corporation. She spent about an hour and a half with us. She took my entire story asked many questions then reviewed my notes and MRIs.
Her recommendation was do a seven day EEG to rule out seizures, migraines, etc. Also have brain, c-spine, t-spine and lumbar MRIs. Add to that about 50 different blood tests. “In cases like this, it sometimes takes months before we can nail down a diagnosis, but we’ll get there.” Those were her exact words. HOPE. She gave us hope. So, why do I call her Dr. Corporation. Keep reading, you’ll see.
For the next six weeks I went through tests and waited for early March 2006. I knew Dr. Corporation would help me, help us. She seemed so kind. By this time, my right leg was stiff like a cement pillar, my left leg was only slightly better. I kept dragging my toes as I made my way. My legs felt as heavy as cement pillars as well. I would say “as I walked” but by this time on one could really call it walking. Severe vertigo made it impossible for me to drive. Sometimes all I could do was sit on my couch. My hands were losing sensation like my legs and incoordination had spread to the hands as well. I still felt very, very tired.
On the drive to my follow-up appointment with Dr. Corporation hubby and I spoke about the real possibility that I had multiple sclerosis like my two sisters. One sister was already diagnosed with MS when I started with my issues. She was on Copaxone and doing pretty well. My other sister went to her pcp and told him about some cognitive issues she was having along with her history over the past seven years of repeatedly being down with “unknown viruses” for a couple of months a time before recovering. After blood work and brain MRI, she was diagnosed with relapsing remitting multiple sclerosis like my other sister.
Hubby reminded my that although my pcp thinks MS, I was very different than my sisters. They had distinct relapses then recovery. I continually slid downwards with worsening of symptoms a few new ones. I knew Dr. Corporation would help; she seemed like she cared, wanted to help, knew how to help.
In Dr. Corporation’s empty waiting room we sat for almost an hour before being quickly (quick was not easy for me) ushered into an exam room. Dr. Corporation opened the door and without even closing the door she told me my tests were all negative. There was nothing else she could do. THAT WAS IT! FIVE SECONDS AT BEST! Then she turned to leave.
“Wait!” hubby pleaded. She slowly returned to the room. I wanted to know if I could get off Topamax if my EEG was normal. I could. There must be something wrong with me, look at me. You said you could help, may take awhile. “I was wrong.” That was her response.
I have since found out that this “well respected clinic” had a great track record treating MS patients because they accept or treat only those patients that can be successfully treated. She was just following Corporate Policy hence Dr. Corporation.
Hopeless. That is all I felt. Hopeless.
Atypical Multiple Sclerosis 